Love in Lockdown, Stress in Freedom

During lockdown, Bruneians stayed home — and the cradles filled up. But when life sped up, stress and separations increased. 

The data reveal a truth we all felt: when we lose time, we lose balance. Maybe Brunei’s next big change under Wawasan 2035 isn’t economic — it’s human.

☕ KopiTalk with MHO 

“When the world slowed down, love blossomed. When it sped up again, hearts — and minds — began to break.”

The Calm Before the Rush

During the quiet months of quarantine, Bruneians found themselves stuck at home — rediscovering time, meals, and each other.

The latest Vital Statistics 2024 confirms what many felt: when life paused, love — and life itself — had room to grow.

As movement restrictions kept people home, marriages jumped from 2,180 in 2019 to 2,746 in 2021, and live births surged from 6,178 to 6,751.

For a nation of just over half a million, that was a big deal — a baby boom sparked by the stillness of lockdown.

One young husband I chatted with remembered with a smile, “We got married over Zoom — just our parents and the kadhi. It wasn’t grand, but it was beautiful.”

Maybe it was that shared time — long talks, chores together, fewer distractions—that reignited the love in homes that were usually too busy for it.

The Baby Bump That Vanished

But like all good things, the boom didn’t last.

By 2024, births had dropped sharply to 5,359, a 14.8 per cent decline from the previous year. 

The total fertility rate fell to 1.5 kids per woman, well below the 2.1 replacement level needed to keep the population stable.

It was like the brief baby boom — born from togetherness — disappeared as soon as life got back to normal.

Once flights resumed and offices filled up, the cradles emptied again.

This wasn’t just Brunei’s story. Other places like Singapore, Malaysia, and Japan saw similar pandemic baby bumpsfollowed by record-low fertility when restrictions eased.

Demographers now say it was “a moment of hope mistaken for a trend” — a sign of emotional calm, not demographic recovery.

From Love Lockdown to Emotional Whiplash

The data reveal another, more sobering trend: as marriages peaked during lockdown, divorces surged soon after.

From 606 in 2019 to 735 in 2023, the number of separations hit a six-year high.

The average divorce age — 37.8 for men, 35.7 for women — indicates breakups often happen in mid-life, when family and career stress collide.

Many who found companionship during quarantine later faced conflict when life picked up again.

The very couples who once bonded over home-cooked meals felt stretched thin by deadlines, debts, and everyday exhaustion.

Sociologists call it the post-pandemic marital whiplash — the shock of re-entering a world that didn’t match the closeness of lockdown.

The Hidden Pandemic Within

The official stats don’t include suicide data, but mental health indicators tell a different story.

The Brunei Mental Health Strategy 2022–2027 shows a steady rise in anxiety and depression consultations since 2022, especially among young people aged 18–35.

Globally, the World Health Organisation noted a 25% increase in anxiety and depression cases in the first year of the pandemic — a wave that hasn’t fully receded.

In Brunei, more young professionals are now talking about burnout, “quiet quitting,” and feeling emotionally drained.

It’s like the country went from a collective pause to a collective sprint — without catching its breath in between.

The Clock That Rules Our Lives

When people had time, they had love. When they lost time, they lost balance.
The pandemic showed that flexible hours, remote work, and shorter workweeks don’t kill productivity — they enhance humanity.

In Iceland, a two-year trial of shorter workweeks made workers happier while keeping output steady. 

In Japan, Microsoft’s four-day workweek experiment boosted productivity by 40%.

Even Singapore found that companies embracing hybrid work had better employee retention and morale.

If stress can weaken families, lower fertility, and affect mental health, then work-life balance is more than just a lifestyle choice — it’s a national policy issue.

A strong nation is one where productivity doesn’t come at the expense of peace of mind.

A Wake-Up Call for Wawasan 2035

Wawasan Brunei 2035 aims for “a well-educated, highly skilled, and high-quality people.”

But those words could mean nothing if the people behind them are burnt out, anxious, and disconnected.

In 2024, Brunei’s population growth rate was just 1.1%, the lowest in a decade.

The working-age group (15–64) still makes up 72.8% of the population — but that share will shrink if fertility stays below replacement and young adults delay marriage or decide not to have kids.

The result is clear: fewer workers in the future, more reliance on foreign labour, and a growing gap between demographic goals and social realities.

Family well-being, mental health, and time itself need to be seen as national assets — just as important to Wawasan 2035 as education or technology.

Because when the heart of a nation slows, so does its future.

“In the end, it wasn’t the virus that tested us most — it was the pace of life we returned to.” (MHO/10/2025)